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06 December 2007

mou kimetta... yappari kareru jyan.

i'm in the period of the year i call "tween-ember." it's the time between thanksgiving and christmas here in the 'states... its usually the time of year where i'd normally be so busy with making holiday and new year commercials, attending holiday parties, and trying to solidify plans to be with family, i'm too busy to really sleep much less blog. this year is different due to money being ever-so-tight and i already spent more than enough time with family during thanksgiving.

Im still working day-to-day contracts and getting my training done for tax season 2008 (if you need your taxes done, contact me!) so i am semi-busy, but i miss the stability (and clockwork pay!) of a steady gig so i did some serious soul searching and decided-- unless i get the opportunity of a lifetime, i'm headed back to japan in '08.

thats right. after 5 years, i'm ready to go back. a lot of my decision is due to me being "homesick" for my friends and the places there, but there are other reasons too...

* my great granny just turned 100 on november 26th; she lived her dreams and i still have yet to live mine--im inspired

* i really have nothing to lose at this point... the things that really kept me here this long are gone (family obligations, women, jobs)

* most importantly, im am so ready for a change. in all facets of my life i am bored, dissatisfied, disappointed, and disallusioned. Japan is unforgiving at times but is never dull, and more than anything, i abhor bordom.

* relationship-wise, my life is more barren than the frozen Siberian tundra. I'm convinced there is no such thing as a decent chick in this part of the world that isnt materialistic, flighty, indecisive, and/or plain ignorant. When i happen upon someone that isn't some combination of the above (or more like a tolerable amount) she soon turns and goes south on me... whether its my fault or not, the fact remains there's a pattern here that i never encountered in my stints overseas. While i'm not going to japan strictly because of this, it is a factor in the decision and while i also had girl problems in japan previously, it was totally different to the dismal issues i've had here.

* lastly, i miss things i can't do here... wearing my jinbei most summer nights around the neighborhood and having random conversations because Japanese aren't used to seeing a 6 foot black guy with dredlocks wearing one. eating takoyaki in minami, osaka. summer hanabi and matsuri. hanami parties. walking to Lawson/Seven/Family at 3am for one beer and a salmon onigiri then eating and drinking outside next to the police box. riding the train for no reason other than seeing how far i can get on 400 yen.

bottom line--i just want something different in my life and im tired of the damn monotony and melancholy that has engulfed me lately. Ima ha yume no naka ni iri no jikan ga tsutteimashita.
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