The view from the other side...

There's a saying that goes "you can't see the forest, for the trees. I've been back in Japan for a year and a half now and I'm at the point where the newness has faded and day-to-day life has set in. This is my reality, and back home is like a fantasyland now. I'll be traveling back to the land of cheap pizzas, bigger houses, and women who wear pants--otherwise known as America, next month. I miss home. I miss pizza that costs less than $20 and has toppings that don't involve corn or mayonnaise. I miss going to Barnes & Noble and reading all the car magazines, killing hours of time in the process. And of course I miss my friends and family. But I forget that there was a big reason why I came here to Japan in the first place. This is where I am meant to be right now. Read earlier posts in this blog before I came here and you'll get it. I need to be here--it's an inescapable feeling I've always had, and in the end, only goes away when I'm here. But I can't see the forest for the trees right now... So sometimes it takes a wake-up call from friends to shake me back into reality.

1:05pmRashad

I think in your being in Japan for so long

you've forgotten what a wonder it is to outside eyes

and you trivalize stuff

there are things there that just don't happen here

and I think you need to focus more on Japan's uniqueness

like the Akirabura [Akihabara] section or however you say it

The fact that manga is read by young and old there

the cosplay

the cuisine all of these would be great topics

even the kickass electronics

1:07pmJason

True-- but that's true of anyplace that you make into your home man. once you're here everyday-- making a living, going about day-to-day socializing, that all changes..

back in '96 I was saying the same thing about ATL. [Atlanta, GA, USA, my permanent residence...for now...]

but it became my home

and then the day-to-day grind sets in

Of course A-town is unique

and I still love it-- its my home

but I've been there so long so I have the right to critsize the faults too

the glamor has faded

Japan for me is like that in some ways

of course I find out new stuff everyday

1:09pmRashad

guess i have a love for the place i want people to see it through my virgin eyes

1:09pmJason

and I'm very aware of the my catbird position being here

but I've lived here on and off for 10 years almost

so I can see it without the pretty packaging too

1:10pmRashad

why im so fascinated by it

1:10pmJason

I can see the social issues that keep this place behind in some ways

but I also know that this is still the same dreamy place it was back in 2000 when I first got off the plane

and there are lots of things that happen here that arent even possible anywhere else

did you read our gaijin superstar article?

1:12pmRashad

but i see it's beauty the culture women and food trumps anything here

I would so have me a fine japanese chic plump with child

as i ate my rice ball and watched chin chan

1:15pmJason

Read this for some real-talk on life here http://snipurl.com/tz5bq

1:18pmJason

I'm coming home March 9th. I'm homesick. I want a real pizza. I want hotwings. Some steak n shake. A porterhouse. I wanna see some big-booty chics twerk it at Strokers. Some sista ass at lenox. But midway thru my vacay, I'll long for onigiri, petite school-girl uniform or yukata-clad girls, and the ablility to buy beer and blacks from a vending machine at 3am and sip and smoke out in public

I'll miss my tiny-ass apartment and friends I have here too. Especially the chicas.

1:20pmJason

I'll miss jumping on the train to go places and hate having to remember where I parked again... I'll miss hot-springs, and friendly children that ask me strange questions about my privates (kids have no shame here...)

I'm coming home March 9th. I'm homesick. I want a real pizza. I want hotwings. Some steak n shake. A porterhouse. I wanna see some big-booty chics twerk it at Strokers. Some sista ass at lenox. But midway thru my vacay, I'll long for onigiri, petite school-girl uniform or yukata-clad girls, and the ablility to buy beer and blacks from a vending machine at 3am and sip and smoke out in public

I'll miss my tiny-ass apartment and the 3 girls I call on the regular.  I'll miss jumping on the train to go places and hate having to remember where I parked again... I'll miss hot-springs, and friendly children that ask me strange questions about my privates (no shame here...)

1:21pmJason

One question--can I post this convo on my blog-- I think everyone will want to see this...

1:24pmRashad

This me dude, there are 2 memebers in the firm that have no reservations that's me and you you I don't give a shit, Just edit my spelling

1:24pmJason

Coolness man. I got you on that.

1:25pmRashad

Jason look at it from my stand point

1:25pmJason

This is cool though, thanks for that-- I sometimes do forget that about this place... it's easy as hell to get lost in that day-to-day grind

1:26pmRashad

I'm mixed and even though I have the classic fair skinned male thing going

I'm nothing like a typical black male

I dont find listening to rap music sagging my pants or anything else stero typically black intresting

1:28pmRashad

Chez has the anime connection like me but he's not into partying and chics like I am you know he's reserved. Mike is retired and has a kid, Sidney is married George isn't into the party side like me but not the anime manga side

1:29pmJason

True true.

everyone has their thing going on right now

1:29pmRashad

so where does that leave me often times I'm in a room full of people and I feel alone because I have non of the interest they do

1:30pmJason

its like that when we all get older man. Hell I'm 32, and apparently according to my parents, grandparents and half of who I know on both sides of the world, I'm supposed to be married and have kids...

1:30pmRashad

In Japanese culture I see kindred spirits even if we are of different color I feel as though I can relate to them

1:31pmJason

You can, I know I can, hence why I am here

1:31pmRashad

I watched the Godzilla marathon and when Final Wars came on I was amazed i was like get em G' man

1:32pmRashad

So Japan has always been home to me in a weird way. I love cherry blossom trees, and koi, and the elegant design food everything there is done with pride and art

1:34pmRashad

ist style people at home don't have that kind of dedication and pride in the things they do. There is no honor hear people with back stab you Japan is a culture built on honor. Here we through are elders away there they revere them

1:34pmJason

I love all that about this place too. but everyday isn't a matsuri here and everyplace isnt kyoto...

There are people afraid that the new generations will lose exactly what we love about this place here.

that's what I talk about with older folks here.

1:35pmRashad

I'm sure it ain't all Dragon Ball Z and high tech electronics but there has to be something there that's calling my soul I refuse to believe other wise

1:36pmJason

Japan has its share of back stabbers too-- just follow Japanese politics long enough and some of the things make our goverment look like fraggle rock! (ever seen OUR finance minister drunk at a G8 summit?)

So if that's calling to you, then go to it man, go.

Do what I did, save them coins, then jump off the cliff.

1:39pmRashad

Jason I use to hate your me 1st ways but it pushed you to were you are I decided to put me first this year

And just maybe I'll make it there. I guess you can tell me what I have to do to stay awhile if I ever make it out there

1:41pmRashad

I'm sick of the states I've lived in 8 states and the food has lost it''s taste the the water it's appeal I feel like a Vampire my thirst can no longer be quench by what these petty mortals have to offer.

1:42pmRashad

At first you think your crazy when you feel this way wondering why you don't fit in when your younger but the older you get. You start to see the lines of the Matrix and realized your one of the few enlighten ones and the rest of these folks are just cows going to slaughter

1:43pmJason

I knew that when I was back in the A, and I used that feeling to push me

you gotta use that feeling. Take that negative energy and push it into something positive

Make it your own thing. Control it, dont let it control you

1:45pmRashad

really sad actually I live in a society where people look forward to seeing Real Chance @ Love these people here are lost man. And I need to jump ship and get to the island before the mainland Zombies devour me

1:45pmJason

Everyday I wake up I ask myself What the F am I doing here? But when I go to sleep I think thank God I live here again.

I like being outside at 3am drinking a beer on the street and not having cops roll up on me just because

I like being able to just talk to some girl and not have some negative attitude bite my face off

I like just being able to breathe and do my thing without negative vibes thrown at me

1:47pmRashad

dude trust me you aren't missing a thing here this economy is horrible, these women are exhausting, you are in the right place

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