I've been going through a lot in 2008, and it's only just begun. As much as I try to remain positve, a tremendous amount of sadness has already occured. My oldest brother is in jail in my hometown on murder charges that he shouldn't even have... My granny had a stroke that has started her on the path for her homegoing (Those of you that know me know I don't believe in death; only in another life beyond this one. Consequently passing on doesn't evoke sadness from me unless you are killed, or die way too young.) I am both happy and sad for my granny. Happy because she's heading for the Great Continueum, the nexus that all lives and souls end and begin, but sad because I won't see her for a while, and have so many memories of her keeping my brother and I when we were kids.
Which leads me to a greater sadness, because when she finally does pass, my brother Pete will not be able to attend her funeral because he's imprisioned. He knew granny the best, and had such a special relationship with her. I'm also saddest for my mom; granny raised her without any help and my mother adores her, and now it's all on her to make these preparations... But also keep in mind we were just in St Louis last weekend to try and get my brother some legal counsul.
This weekend too finds me in St Louis once again searching my soul for reasons why 2008 is starting off so surrealistic... Its like I'm sleeping awake in a nightmare. You know, I was looking forward to taking my 2 teenaged rugrat "almost siblings" to the movies and just generally watch them cause mayhem all over the place and laugh--when I hang out with them, I tend to forget I'm as old as I am, and regress a little bit back in time when I had no bills, little responsibilities and my only worries had to do with hoping the pimple I got on my face would disappear if whatever girl I was into at the time saw me... God I miss those days.
When this is over, and things return to some state of relative calmness, please buy your buddy J a drink... He could use it.
...oh yeah, the rule of threes suggest that bad things happen in triads; so somewhere sometime soon perhaps one last thing could happen to us. I can't take much more.
Currently listening : Alpha
By Sevendust
Blogged with Flock
This is an experiment of sorts to try to tie together my online identity and my offline personality. I've made plenty of business oriented sites, but I have never actually put together one for myself personally... With the advent of social networking sites like Facebook and Myspace along with blog sites like Blogger and Twitter, I find that I have cut a wide swath here in the internet, in terms of being actively online, but there isn't one place to really tie that information together. So this will be an attempt at doing so.